Dear me...

Dear younger me, 

I wanted to write in order to share some gospel truth with you.  In your mind at the moment, the world swings between a devastatingly hard place to live, and paradise.  But this is for you in your darker moments.  

Sweet child I'm asking you to stop looking in the mirror and judging the girl you see there.  Nay, I'm begging that you would stop that.  Do you know how it will fill your life with insecurity?  You need to see that it's going to affect how you look at yourself now that you are 20.  You also need to know that it gets better. Oh I'm not talking about our looks, although with age comes a certain maturity and style.  I'm talking about how we see our self.  If only I would lend you my eyes for a second so you could see the new reflection.  We look pretty similar but there is more to this reflection.  A depth that is not explained by hormones or study.  I can see a sadness in the eyes that wasn't seen before.  I can see a trusting heart that has been betrayed a few too many times, cried too many tears.  I can see an awareness of my sin more potently than ever.  But there is something else mixed in.  With the sadness there is a knowledge displayed of ultimate joy.  There is the lingering fingerprints of the comfort of the Lord.  There is a big part of your heart for your friends.  The true friends who haven't betrayed you and never will.  And I can see a depth that I didn't possess when I was you. My knowledge has grown, not only of the sin and depravity in this world but also my knowledge of grace and mercy.  I can truly claim; 'where sin increased, grace increased all the more.' It hasn't been an easy couple of years, but I know now that God has been there every single step of the way.  

With much love, 

Erin 

What's new?

I just posted my last blog post and I realized that I am such a different person from the 16 year old who started this blog years ago.  This blog has been sorely neglected and I can safely say that it is not widely popular but it is such a unique way to present ideas that I would be crazy not to utilize it.

So what has changed in the last two years since I last caught up on this blog?  I have graduated from my undergraduate and work as a sleep scientist; which is fancy language saying that I literally watch people sleep for a living.  I have completely changed my life plan from being a doctor and changed it to being a teacher.  I still struggle with this decision.  I have traveled Europe for two months and experience the exhilarating feeling of being thrown completely out my comfort zone. I have grown independent, experienced heartache and most importantly grown more mature in my faith.  And in all the growth, I can honestly say; Christ reigns over all and he is good.

Neglected Knowledge

This is my first blog post in a really long time, and I feel that so much has changed from when I last posted.

I am reading through Proverbs at the moment, and as always it is taking me a really long time to progress.  I started Proverbs last week and I am currently in chapter three! But the reason for the lag is not a negative one.  No, instead it is the glorious hesitation that comes with savoring a fantastic meal.  You want every bite to leave it's impression permanently on your taste buds so you wait between every bite.  Every time I go to read I am caught by something anew.  What is it this time? What so captured my attention that I got my computer out at 11:00 PM in order to write it in a blog?  It is this thought; has the focus on wisdom that is so emphasized in teachings about Proverbs overshadowed the command to "get knowledge".  I'm not saying to elevate the "getting of knowledge" to a point where the gospel becomes all head knowledge. No, I am wondering if maybe we have overlooked the value in knowledge and understanding.

Proverbs 2:6 says this; "For the LORD gives wisdom, from his mouth come knowledge and understanding." Over and over in Proverbs there is the exhortation to "get wisdom".  But more often than not along with this command is this; "gain understanding" or "get knowledge".  In my experience the modern western church emphasizes so emphatically the wisdom.  My interpretation of this until so recently has been of this saying is to feel the guidance and leading of the Lord in a tangible way.  When I read the command to "get wisdom" in isolation from the "get knowledge" I am left with a sentimental hope that somehow knowledge will fall from heaven into my life.  What if by ignoring the "get knowledge" I am actually ignoring the entire way that I can "get wisdom"?  Such an emphasis in the church is in airy fairy faith.  But maybe the way that we can firmly bank this faith, firmly root this wisdom is by studying. Maybe by studying the word, studying books, opening our eyes to the worldviews surrounding us, maybe then we shall finally gain wisdom.

I have been taking a large interest in Philosophy recently and studying and pondering metaphysics.  In a book that I am reading called 'Saving Leonardo' the author (Nancy Pearcy) calls for a new way of constructing our faith.  This "radical" way of viewing faith is by coming from a wholistic standpoint.  In the entire story of the gospel there has been intense spiritual parallels displayed in very physical events.  In the original Passover the gospel was connected by showing Jesus as the lamb slain.  In the testing of Abraham in sacrificing his son there is the spiritual parallel of the Father God sacrificing his son.  All throughout the bible there is two intertwining stories, that of the physical and that of the spiritual.  These two stories are so closely woven together that everything begins to have spiritual significance.  Therefore, if God is wholistic, if He is in the sciences as well as in the arts then most surely He is the gaining of knowledge as well as the gaining of wisdom.  He has set up a way that we can expand our wisdom by physically studying here on earth.  Please do not misunderstand me.  I am not claiming that just by studying we can obtain godly wisdom.  This would be an absurd claim, all wisdom and knowledge comes from God as Proverbs claims.  All I am proposing is maybe the church should start encouraging real thought, real study and celebrate the intellectuals, rather than shying away from that person as being a head person as opposed to the heart person.  We need both, and we all individually need to strive for both.

A journal entry...

Hey Friends!!!  Forgive me for being so absent from the blogosphere... I have no excuse. :P

So I'm going to begin by asking a favor of you... or rather ask you to do a favor for yourself.  If you have time... please read 1 John 3:19-24.  As an explanation of this post I have to tell you that I journal a lot... like A LOT. The way I journal is letters to God.... because that is how I acknowledge to him that he knows everything... and often it is so helpful to write down prayers.  This is an entry I wrote earlier this month:

11th July 2012

Dear Heavenly Father,

The concept that I have your spirit is so massive.  The fact that you abide in me just blows my mind.  I do believe in Christ Jesus but Lord I so often fail at loving others.  I have but a  hint of how much you love me, and the enormity of it does my head in, it really does.  You say that if have confidence before God we will receive what we ask for.  I ask as Solomon asked, I asked for wisdom.  I also ask Father that you will give me your love for people.  I can be so much in my head Lord that I lose my compassion. Help me to love by prayer for people, give me joy in serving people.  May I have a servants heart and a humble mind to better serve you and others.  Guide me, keep me, show me your for me.  As you promise; "For I know the plans I have for you' declares the Lord, 'plans for wholeness and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope." (Jeremiah 29:11)  Keep me in the palm of your hand.
Thank you so much for the all the blessings you pour out on me.

Your girl;

Erin

I hope friends that this encourages you as it did me.  Keep in the way of the Lord!!!

AWOL.... again

Hi Friends!!! 

I'm beginning to pick up a trend in my blogging habits: wait until everything is due and.... BLOG!!! I have exams coming up and assignments due but oh well.  They can wait. 

So I have been musing on some things the lately, and for those of you who are older than 17 you will probably chuckle with amusement... in fact if you are 17 or younger you will still probably chuckle with amusement. :P  

Have you ever felt the process of growing up?  You can see the changes in you and it gives you a bit of a funny feeling.  I am getting more independent and this makes me want to be five again.  It's scary and exciting all at once.  I want to be older and I am having a blast as a young adult, but responsibility is creeping up and it is an exhausting feeling.  I am almost half way through my degree and thinking about having to move away from home for medical school, or going overseas for three months, while being extremely exciting, are also a little sad.  I will leave my family, my carefree days behind me and have to take full responsibility for my actions. 

Oh. Boy. 

The challenge for me is to trust God through it all and to depend on his amazing faithfulness and mercy to get me through.  I will grow up, but I will not leave my childhood behind... I'll take it with me. 

Blessings friends!!!  

P.S. Another little glimpse into the mind of Erin: 

Twitter posts!

Okay so I discovered this twitter feed called I Do That Too and seriously some of them I couldn't stop laughing for.  I thought I might share my favorite 20 here:  


1. The guy who discovered milk....What was he doing with that cow?.


2. Not being able to finish a sentence because your laughing about the ending


3. i hate it when i forget something i really wanted to say.


4. Accomplishing something before the microwave reaches :00..


5. Thanks phone, for being strong every time i dropped you..


6. Dear Math, Grow up and solve your own problems..

7. When I was a kid I........no wait, I still do that.

8. I always wonder what I look like from someone elses eyes..

9. Why are you sleeping in class? maybe because i wake up at 6 AM to come here (so true!)

10. IT WASN'T ME!!!!! Oh that........ yes that was me.

11. Pandas are the least racist animal, they're black, white AND asian.

12. Why is Monday so far away from Friday, and Friday so close to Monday.

13. The feeling you get when you understand something in math class..

14. When i read ur text messages I can hear exactly how you would say it.

15. Dear Homework, You're Not Attractive and I'm Not Doing You

16. I forgot your name, so i'm waiting for somebody to say it.

17. Comebacks that make the whole room go OOOOOHHHHHH'"

18.Telling inanimate objects to STAY when they look like they're going to fall

19. I'd rather do nothing at your house than at mine

20. That Moment of joy when you see your food coming in a restaurant

21. Dear sleep, I know we had problems when I was younger, but now I love you

22. mom, i could be dying and you're not answering the phone

23. I can't hear you, so ill just laugh and hope it wasn't a question

24. Open fridge, nothing. Freezer? nothing. Might as well try the fridge again. (study sessions anyone 

:P)

25. No, I'm not being immature, I'm having fun. You should try it

26. I love how my best friend and I can say one word, and crack up (:

27. My level of maturity changes depending on who im with.

28. I Will Go Slightly Out of My Way To Step On A Crunchy-Looking Leaf

29. I Wish Music Played During Epic Moments of My Life and Not Just in Movies.

30. No I'm not lying, but when you look at me like that, how can I not smile?

31. Laughing when someone falls

32. paper beats rock? ok,i'll throw a rock at u & u defend urseself with paper

33. I hate saying hi to people and they don't see you and you feel stupid

34. i finally stop laughing... look back over at you and start all over again

35. If the world ends in 2012, i've wasted my whole life in school. . . lovely.

36. Not finishing a sentence because your laughing too hard about the ending

37. BUT MOM...why would any of my friends jump off a bridge

38. Tripping, then looking back at what tripped you with an evil glare.

39. How did Barbie manage to be a doctor, model, actress, teacher and singer?

40. Life is getting too complicated , i wanna be 5 again

Yeah yeah I know there is 40, I meant favorite 20 x 2. :P  Just as a side note there is the odd tweet that has some bad language :( so I apologize. 

Have a wonderful day friends!!! 

So friends...

Hi again,

I have to leave for uni in 1/2 an hour so I just quickly wanted to share a short film my brother shot for a youtube competition.  It cost him $300.00 to make and he made it in 10 days.  Pretty good if I do say so myself.  Anyway, enjoy!!!!