Calvary Road

Hey!!!  I'm seriously getting better at this posting thing.  This is like the second time this week!!  I don't know if this is a procrastination tactic or because I honestly want to share something with you....

Well my dear people, you probably wonder how much can change in two days?  I'm sort of in shock how much.  God doesn't really waste much time when you are truly open to changing your heart.  Okay I'll stop rambling and tell you what I've learned in the past 2 days:

I have realized that I travel better in my Christian faith when I'm reading a devotional, or some sort of Christian teaching book, so I found our copy of Roy Hession's 'Calvary Road'.  To be perfectly honest I was really scared to begin with.  A number of people in my church have read this book and they really emphasized the fact that they were broken when they finished it. My reaction was... *Gulp* Broken??  That doesn't sound to healthy.  But on Wednesday night I got to the end of my wits.  We had cell group (also called home group) God had another mental hammering in my mind.  My mum, who was leading the group asked this question;

'If you knew that Jesus was returning tomorrow, what would you do?'

Thinking about it I was horrified to hear my answer.  My first thought was; 'I probably wouldn't believe it.'  

This really knocked me about 'how could I let myself get this hard?'.  Let me explain... I've been a christian for as long as I remember.  I have very vivid memories of me praying to God at around four years of age.  I've made good decisions, and, often seeing my siblings making the "really" bad decisions, I've deliberately stayed away from doing those things.  My mum often describes me as her "easy" child.  So to get to the point where I wouldn't believe it if Jesus was coming back really hit me hard. 

As is says in 1 Thessalonians 5:2:

'For you yourselves are fully aware that the day of the Lord will come like a thief in the night.'

I've always been told to act as if today was the last day on earth, but somehow it has never penetrated the skin. It really troubled me how hard my heart had got.  So I remembered what people said about reading Roy Hession's book and being broken.  The biggest desire in my heart was to be broken, to have my heart softened.  So I picked up the book with a quaking heart praying that it wouldn't be so painful.  

Read it.  Seriously, it is amazing.  I was reminded of the peace that comes with knowing Jesus and I'm so grateful that our wonderful God accepted me back into his loving arms.  So here I am, a broken and damaged vessel, but willing to be so if I can glorify my maker.  

Don't let your heart harden to the message.  Life sucks when that happens. 

God bless!

P.S Pic's by Ron DiCianni.  The picture links to the source. :)